There is poetry for people like me
who hate talking on phones
because on occasion
it will happen that
I find myself having to call someone
long distance to bitch because
I’m in a cute dress that unzips in the back
and now I’m fucking stuck
because
I don’t have a boyfriend to unzip me
and I didn’t think of that
when I put it on
just to hear my sister
on the other end of the line say
“I know how you feel” and that
the dress isn’t worth it
so rip the goddam thing off
you can go buy another
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